Trouble

Hoo-boy, did Lin get in trouble last night!

Lin has an incredibly annoying habit of "pretending" to be asleep or pretending to not hear us when it's time to do something. This happens most often in the car. She will pretend to be asleep in the back seat when it's time to get out of the car, forcing Dave and/or I to stand outside the car with her door open, saying over and over "come on Lin. Come on, Lin." This is the kind of thing that's cute about... once. After that, I'm done. I've told her a number of times to stop doing this. And last night I decided to teach her a lesson.

I had taken the girls to get their hair cut (Ruby got about 4 inches cut off -- super cute!). As we were walking out Lin stopped in the doorway. Just stopped. I held the door. I said "come on, Lin." She didn't budge. I told her that I wasn't going to stand outside in the cold rain and wait for her and I walked to the car. Every few steps I looked back at the door and motioned for her to follow me. She just stood there. So after I buckled Ruby into the car I looked back toward the door, just in time to see Lin slip around the corner of the building. With thoughts of "Why, you little *#@!" I got in the car and drove to that side of the building. No Lin. I proceeded to have a minor heart attack, until she came out from between two cars.

Well, when she got into the car I pretty much let her have it. I told her to not ever do that to me again. It's not funny and I'm sick of it! I certainly wasn't screaming at her, but my voice was raised to a level that I don't think Lin has heard me use before. As we drove home I knew she was crying a bit. Of course I don't want to see my child cry, but I knew that I had to get through to her, and this was the way to do it. I didn't say anything to comfort her. She needed to feel bad for what she'd done.

We got home and I told Dave what had happened. He told her the same things I did (although in a nicer tone of voice), that it's not funny and that she needs to stop doing this. I told her how terrified I had been when I couldn't see where she was. She tried to come back by saying that no one had asked her how she felt. She was scared, too. She thought that I was leaving her. Wellllll....... good. Now she knows there's a consequence to her actions and hopefully she won't pull that crap again.

She did apologize to me later and it seemed genuine, so I think maybe, just maybe, she got the message.

Marshmallows

Yesterday Ruby and I were eating marshmallows (yum!). I told her that I had a dream once that I was eating marshmallows and when I woke up, my pillow was gone.

She laughed and laughed!

Having a 4-year-old is really fun (sometimes).

It's Monday

I'm so sorry for neglecting my blog so much this past month. I guess I haven't felt like there's much to write about lately. We're just living life here. Work, school, dinner, homework, bedtime... Rinse and repeat.

We took the girls to a hotel/waterpark two weeks ago and had a great time. Who would have thought that Lin, who would barely put her feet in the water last summer, would have such a great time at a water park? She LOVES the water! I'm thinking about getting her into swimming lessons before summer, so that she knows the actual mechanics of swimming. She's great on the water slides but I think she would still be hesitant if she were just in a regular swimming pool. Thinking about how great she is on her bike (she never learned to ride a bike in China) makes me think that if she knew how to swim there'd be no stopping her!

We have booked a trip to *Disney*World* for this fall! We will celebrate Lin's 14th birthday there and, needless to say, we are all very excited! In fact, I'm afraid that Ruby may be a bit too excited. Did I mention that we're not going until October?! I worry that over the next several months Ruby's excitement will grow and grow until she is a complete disaster by the time we board the plane!

Lin has been just a little bit of a challenge the last few days or so. There's another blog I follow that describes "the wall" that older adopted kids hit at some point and I wonder if that's what Lin's experiencing. The realization that being in a family is actually not always great. There are behavioral expectations. There are siblings to deal with. There are household chores to do. There's homework every day. There are days which are, quite frankly, lousy. And for me, dealing with my first teenaged child, I'm not sure how much slack I'm supposed to give her. My first instinct when she starts getting a bad attitude about things is to tell her to straighten up. Knock it off. Deal with it. But then I wonder if that's the right thing to say? I certainly don't mean that I will cater to her and baby her when she's in a lousy mood. But maybe I should be a little bit more understanding of what she's going through before I judge her too harshly. After all, she started a whole new life at probably the most difficult time for any kid. If she wants to pout and be sulky once in a while, maybe I should just get off her back.

"My Jungle Tiger"

We received a wonderful surprise in the mail last week from the Shanghai Children's Home. A book filled with artwork titled "Tiger Drawings by Tiger Kids" that were on exhibit at the Shanghai Contemporary Art Museum and our Lin was a featured artist. Yeah! We asked if she knew her artwork was at the museum and she just shrugged her shoulders and said she saw it. Talk about modest! Anyways, we are quite proud.